Rants In E Minor: Dubstep, I just don't get it!

NME.com recently published this article, on dubstep, proclaiming 2009 to be the year that dubstep "broke". Now forgive me for being pernickity, but the term "broke" or "breaking" usually refers to becoming prominent in the mainstream, say like Arctic Monkeys in 2005/2006 or the explosion of punk in 1976/77. Let me ask you, can you see anything like either of those right now in mainstream culture? I certainly can't. NME have done this before, in 2007, when punk supposedly broke for a second time (conveniently 30 years after the original) but really it was only Gallows who achieved a modicum of fame outside of the underground. In comparison to the Atlantic Ocean-sized impact of the Sex Pistols, The Clash et al, Gallows were like the water in your toilet.



Similarly, dubstep has had little if no affect on the modern world. Okay, punk didn't exactly turn the world on it's head, but it's impossible to ignore the affect it had. Fantastic music that was different to anything heard before, a youth sub-culture that came to symbolise both the genre and the latter half of that decade and a DIY ethic that has survived to this very day. Unfortunately that ethic has helped create this abortion of a genre At the risk of sounding like a wholly out-of-touch 60-something, dubstep is little more than repetitive instrumentals with the occasional looped electronic riff thrown in. It's like listening to fucking Kraftwerk. The genre is miles away from breaking anything; its three biggest points so far, in terms of exposure, are Burial's nomination for the Mercury Prize, a Britney remix and Skream's kinda good remix of La Roux's "In For The Kill". That's it; two b-side remixes and the token urban genre nomination for a prize losing prestige faster than you can say Speech DeBelle.



Whilst almost every other epoch-defining and groundbreaking music genre of the modern era has had widespread appeal and following (Rock N Roll, Punk, Electronica, Dance and House), dubstep seems to be the preserve of either nerdy enthusiasts, with encyclopedic knowledge of the genre, or middle class suburban white kids, yearning to be cool and out there. I'm sure the creators of dubstep tracks put a lot of heart, soul and effort into their music, but it seems like the simplest genre about. Subterranean bass, unbelievably dull and repetitive beats, moody atmosphere, a little cyclical keyboard hook thrown in every now and then, and in Burial's case, snippets of noise from the urban world. Stoned braindead chimps could make an album of this tripe, no problem.



What I find immensely puzzling is that, for a kind of music derived from dance and hip-hop, it borders on impossible to actually dance normally to any dubstep track. Alright, I can't dance normally anyway, but there's actually no way of "rhytmically moving" to it. The most played track in clubs, to my limited knowledge, is Skream's mix of "In For The Kill" and that only even approaches danceable in the last minute or so. What do people do when it comes on? Shuffle and sway for four minutes, then all of sudden start throwing shapes for 60 measly seconds. This is probably one of the reasons I dread going into "indie" clubs. Already-overly-awkward and pasty indie kids pulling their most awkward moves to boring bollocks like this.



Of course I'm not a complete luddite, and hate all things not played on guitar. I like dance music, I like Burial's albums, despite the lack of variety. But to say that dubstep has "broke" and is no part of mainstream culture is as stupid as saying the Lib Dems are favourites for the next election or Katie Price is a respectable human being. The genre was 'born' around 1998, so to say it's only just broken 11 years later is evidence enough to me that we've defnitely run out of ideas and have to resort to elevating the leftovers at the bottom of the musical barrel.

>>>HEAD TO HEAD<<<
Little Boots vs Florence vs La Roux















So it's finally happened. After all the hype, tentative interviews, glamourous photoshoots and all the other bollocks that comes with showbiz, the "Three Hot Ones To Watch in Pop 2009" Little Boots, La Roux and Florence & The Machine have finally all released their albums for public consumption on the derision of music snobs (a.k.a me). Impressively Little Boots and Florence have both made the Top 5 in the Album Charts, but La Roux has grabbed a Number One single which puts her in pole position to become the biggest of the three. But enough chit-chat.

LITTLE BOOTS - HANDS
Big catchy pop tunes, a few of which are better than anything Girls Aloud have released (excluding "Love Machine"). "Stuck On Repeat" is one of the pop singles of the year, without a doubt and succeeds where Madonna and Kylie have failed recently in crafting pure electro-pop that is actually worth listening to. Similarly "Meddle" shows Little Boots' talent for a big pop hook, as does "New In Town". But that's all "Hands" is really, choruses. Even Steps and S Club Juniors could do choruses! Even whilst listening to it now, I can't remember "New In Town"'s verses. When she decides to get a bit ravey (e.g. the intro and chorus to "Earthquake") Little Boots has tunes to rule the charts and the clubs. But whilst she decides to peddle schlock like the overly-80s and tired Symmetry, which features The Human League's Phil Oakley (sample lyrics "You're the night to my day/And the left to my right". Anyone else have an almost jaw-breaking yawn at that?) she'll unfortunately be stuck dangerously close to the pop scrapheap. I'd advise sticking to singles, but then again I have no bearing over anything in music really...at least she's better than The Saturdays.
ESSENTIAL TRACKS: "New In Town", "Earthquake", "Stuck On Repeat"
FOR FANS OF: Madonna, Kylie, Girls Aloud anything big and shiny and pop
5.5

FLORENCE AND THE MACHINE - LUNGS
Or the non-electronic one as she may be seen as. Barely a hint of synth or keyboard anywhere on this album, which leaves Florence seeming more human, more real than tired, boring mainstream pop (Little Boots) or cold, expressionless 80s revivalism (La Roux). Oh, and the fact that she dress like a woodland sprite and is a mainstay on the London scene, but we'll brush past that. "Lungs" is the most ambitious out of the three, with some big orchestral ideas just beneath that "modern Kate Bush" exterior. "Dog Days Are Over" and "Rabbit Heart (Raise It Up)" should be pretty familiar to anyone who's listened to Radio 1/read NME in the last year, as they showcase Flo's good set of lungs (awful pun, sorry) and ear for a tune. Much of the album follows suit, with liberal use of harp and various other folksy elements along with the mystical or magical feel brought on by the lyrics. The only time "Lungs" diverts from the style is for the early White Stripes-aping "Kiss With A Fist" and "Girl With One Eye" which is so bluesy that I imagine it being sung in a smoky bar somewhere in the American south. However, the foresty, folksy schtick does begin to grate after a while with a handful of tracks indistinguishable from each other but skip past them to get to the good stuff.
ESSENTIAL TRACKS: "Dog Days Are Over", "Rabbit Heart (Raise It Up)", "I'm Not Calling You A Liar", "Kiss With A Fist", "Girl With One Eye", "Between Two Lungs", Cosmic Love", "Hurricane Drunk"
FOR FANS OF: Kate Bush, Laura Marling, Bat For Lashes, Lightspeed Champion
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LA ROUX - LA ROUX
La Roux are already on the path to being big. A duo with a public face and a producer beavering away in the background, a unique look, possibly iconic album artwork and of course a Number One single and a Number Two album (thanks to a certain Mr Jackson). Whether they're a retro-futurist pop act to be loved or shameless 80's revivalism to be discarded is an arguement that will rage on for quite a while, but personally, they land somewhere inbetween. The tinny synths of "In For The Kill" as well as the Thriller-esque spoken word middle-eighth belong back with the miners strike and Thatcher, whilst drippy ballad "Cover My Eyes" is sooooo 80s that the video for it would involve a smoke machine with a black background, a slightly out of focus camera, lots of pastel and Elly Jackson on a stool. I don't care if she broke down in tears after recording it, it's shite. But apart from this and the plodding "As If By Magic" and "Reflections Are Protections", "La Roux" is a suprisingly good, modern pop record. It manages to steal the theme of heartbreak from country & western/crappy emo and bring it to the euphoria of electronica without being too cheesy or heavy-handed. Elly Jackson's voice, which trembles between annoyingly fragile and ear-bleedingly shrill often within the same verse, may make it a bit hard to like as well as her looking like the most twattish of LDN scenesters, but don't be suprised if she gathers a few more Number Ones in future.
ESSENTIAL TRACKS: "In For The Kill", "Quicksand", "Bulletproof", "I'm Not Your Toy", "Fascination"
FOR FANS OF: Little Boots, Ladyhawke, Lady Gaga, Passion Pit, Erasure, Eurythmics
8.5

NEU!
>>>TRACKS>>>17.06.09>>> Ash, Florence And The Machine, La Roux, Marina And The Diamonds, Jack Penate, Noisettes, Sam Bennett And The Sharp Knees, Gossip

Ash - Return Of White Rabbit
Rejoice! Arguably the finest singles band of recent times have returned. Having given up making albums to concentrate on a series of singles for the next year (although the best of the lot will be compiled into an album, which kinda defeats the point...), Ash have released this as a precursor to the A-Z singles run. Whilst the heavy bass and disco guitars may be surprising, the amount of pop hooks are as high as ever. Funky and catchy enough to make it a Proper Hit™, it gives a few hints that Ash have some surprises up their sleeves this year.
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Florence & The Machine - Rabbit Heart (Raise It Up)
Probably the oddest title of any song released by a much-hyped pop star so far this year, but this doesn't stop it from being Flo's best single to date. Lyrically it's a postulation on how ruthless the music world can be (a bit dangerous for a fresh, new star who has yet to release her album I reckon), but musically it's far from the ponderouse and worrisome subject matter. A mix of angelic harp-plucking, powerhouse drums and piano that verges on house, with only a little bit of synth tucked in for good measure, it may not be in vouge a la La Roux's/Litte Boots' throwbacks, but it's all the better for it and with a chorus that needs to be shouted out should make Ms Welch very popular at the summer festivals. The pick of the b-sides is Jamie T's lo-fi, dancey & dubby 'Lionheart' mix giving the option of dancing 'til you drop if you don't like the folky feel of the original
8.5

La Roux - Bulletproof
The biggest and most successful of the three hyped music-press-darling poplets (including the aforementioned Florence and Little Boots) having spent a month in the No 2 spot in the charts with "In For The Kill", La Roux look like grabbing their first Number 1 with this. The duo have created a track so 1980s that it should come with free shoulder-pads/Rick Astely/mass unemployment (delete where appropriate). Awash with synthesisers and enough 808 drumbeats to make Kanye West envious, it's a messy contrast to Elly Jacksion's simple vocal melody. The sheer amount of keyboards and electronic noise may not be too appealing to those of advanced years, but it's too catchy to ignore.
8


Marina And The Diamonds - The Crown Jewels EP
A challenger appears! Whilst everyone else is getting concerned with La Florence And The Roux Boot Machine (or something along those lines) young Marina has come along and produced some fantastic pop. Combining the simple charm of Kate Nash with the kookiness of Kate Bush, but without having the name Kate, Marina should be the alternative popstar of choice. Highlight "I Am Not A Robot" is reminiscent of Regina Spektor in it's perky, unusual lyrics and a charming, homemade feel. Definitely one to watch/namedrop to feel "indie".
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Jack Peñate - Be The One
Biggest suprises in music this year? Blur getting back together? The Horrors' amazing second album? Alex Turner's hair (seriously he needs it cutting. Now!)? It could very well be Jack Peñate's second album "Everything Is New". This, the first proper single before the album's release, starts with trumpet blasts usually heard at South American carnivals or Timbaland's latest musical atrocity, instantly a world away from the overly-chirpy ska-pop of Peñate's debut. Despite including a hipster's handbook of influences, from Philidelphia soul to Afrobeat, this is pure pop from start to finish, and all the better for it. It's a remarkable turnaround for indie's whipping boy (circa 2007) and shows he clearly has bigger things in his sights. It's even got a "Born To Run"-style breakdown in the middle, for Pete's sake! Continue with tunes like this, and Mr Peñate could enjoy reverence reaching the level of The Boss...
9

Noisettes - Never Forget You
It's amazing what an advert can do; relieve mid-programme tedium (those Cadbury's ads), make you want to chuck the remote through the TV (again, those Cadbury's ads) and even revive a band's career. First The Clash with those jean commercials aaages ago and now the Noisettes. Okay, it's a bit of a jump between the two in terms of importance and overall greatness, but were it not for "Don't Upset The Rythmn" soundtracking a car ad, then the Noisettes would have been consigned to the pop scrapheap quicker than you can say Danni Minogue. But they've come back with a suprisingly good album and this soulful gem of a single. A Motown-esque bassline 'n' beat along with a smooth croon from Shingai Shoniwa amake for a delightful pop tune, even before the chorus, which is catchy enough to rival Swine Flu, brings in the distorted guitars of their earlier work as well as lucious, lilting strings. They're already fairly big, but if this doesn't cement their place, I'll eat my straw hat.
8.5

Sam Bennett And The Sharp Knees - Hummingbird EP
Odd name, good pop. The unsigned indie-poppers from Nottingham combine the bubblyness of The Rumble Strips and Jack Peñate's debut with The Undertones knack for a good hook to great effect. A warning though; this isn't for any indier-than-thou hipster who's favourite band haven't played one gig, released an album and the only thing available by them is 5 seconds of noise on Pitchfork. Okay, OTT stereotype, but SB&TSK are poppy and don't seem to care. "Two Headed Girl" is a sure-fire future hit whilst the title track shows a softer acoustic side before bursting into pure happiness in pop form and ending with a pretty epic-sounding wall of guitars. In my opinion they're just a Jo Whiley play or two away from the big time.
7.5
[>>>Download a selection of Sam Bennett & The Sharp Knees tracks for free>>>]

Gossip - Heavy Cross
Completing this female-dominated edition of NEU! are Gossip. Remember them? Apparently their record company don't think you will, and have resorted to using uber-hit "Standing In The Way Of Control" on the promo advert for the new album, with a disclaimer saying "'...Control' appears on the previous album of the same name, not on new Gossip album "Music For Men"". It just smacks of desperation to me, but I digress. Basically "Heavy Cross" is Franz Ferdinand, with Beth Ditto's warbling on top. Nothing new, innovative, special. Okay, it's a pretty funky track Ditto is a good singer (and rather scary looking in the video) but there's a feeling that, having soundtracked so many parties thanks to Skins, they should be making awesome pop instead of mediocre retreads. As Beth says herself "it's already been done".
5